Take a Beat

I need to remember to take a moment before I wade into situations. Does that sound familiar?

I get a kick out of working at speed, but when a few weeks (make that months, says my conscience) of stress is added into the mix, I can often speak too soon, or too passionately. My emotions are incredibly useful - for me. I work in a creative job and without them, my drive would go. But my colleagues don't need to know what I'm feeling about what's going on - they just need to know what I suggest we do about it.

So how does someone who has an emotional connection to their work stop themselves from jumping off a the deep end, and reacting to what they think is going on, rather than what is actually happening? By taking a beat. A moment. Make a cup of tea. Take a five minute walk. Wait until after lunch to reply to that email. And if it's got you really, really, REALLY riled up, wait until tomorrow. Seriously.

So now my challenge is how to remind myself to do this. How to jump in when I've just pressed reply and take those fingers off the keyboard. At the moment I'm trying a coded post-it (so colleagues who already think I'm a bit emotional don't now think I'm down right crazy) but suggestions are welcome!

A Trip to Crazy Town

I really, truly love my job - it's what I've always wanted to do since I graduated. At parties, when I tell people what I do, they're genuinely impressed. I get a huge amount of satisfaction out of creating great things, and I know that at the ripe old age of 32 I should be feeling like I'm reaping the benefits of ten years hard graft.

The only problem is, coming into my workplace can sometimes be a trip to crazy town. I can literally almost time it - had a tough week? Crazy town visit today. Someone vital to your team just left? Definitely needs a trip to crazy town.

Take today. Having worked through the weekend and got up at 6am to finish work each day, I'm feeling like the weekend is very, very welcome. So I shouldn't have been shocked when a co-worker asks me to have a meeting with them, then bursts into tears and say they're bleeped off. I ask who they're bleeped off with and they say it's me.

By some fluke, I'm lucky enough to have a delayed reaction to events (probably the same thing that will mean I'm toast in any kind of practical emergency). So we were able to talk about it and I discovered that office gossip had completely misled her. I didn't get an apology, but at least felt like I'd stuck up for reality.

So I guess the thing I really believe in is keeping a steady head when someone else is losing theirs. It's a valuable tool to have in your work toolbox. It doesn't stop you having a bit of a cry in private at the general unfairness (and sometimes downright rudeness) of things, but at least that's later, in the privacy of a locked toilet.

When stuff like this happens, I think a bit of Kipling definitely helps:

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise: